I went on a date by accident. What I thought was an innocent lunch between long-time friends ended up being a date. Let’s start at the beginning.
The Beginning
I have always wholeheartedly believed men and women could be friends. So, when I met this gentleman in 2014, we became fast friends. We talked on the phone and texted regularly. There were no romantic sparks, just genuine interest in one another’s lives. We met at church and hung out from time to time. Every time we talked, I laughed because our conversations were hilarious. We talked about everything from God to careers to our love lives. I enjoyed our friendship.
The Accidental Date
Due to the pandemic and life, we hadn’t seen each other in a while. So one day, my friend suggested we meet up for lunch. I agreed to lunch because we always have fun together. So, the day of the lunch comes, and I’m 1.5 hours late. I was dogsitting and lost track of time. When I looked at my phone, I had many missed calls and texts from him. I called and apologized and told him I’d be there in 5 minutes. (Which is 15 minutes.)
I arrived and didn’t initially see him, so I walked to the restaurant’s entrance. I got distracted by a loudspeaker announcing the going-out-business sale of a nearby store. As I was listening and wondering if I should visit the store after lunch, I saw a man with flowers standing by the entrance. I absent-mindedly thought that was sweet. He is probably surprising his girlfriend. When I got closer, I realized that the guy was my friend.
Surprise! Date by Accident
Confusion covered my face. I wondered if someone else was joining us and why my friend had waited to give the flowers to her since I was so late. Then he handed the flowers to me. I was shocked. I had no idea what to do or say. I’m sure my face showed what I thought because he asked me if I was okay. I finally came to my senses and muttered, “Yes, thank you.” Then we walked into the restaurant. The hostess sat us, and I quickly put the flowers onto a chair and shoved the chair under the table. I didn’t want to look at or even acknowledge them.
I pretended that everything was normal. We laughed, and we had a good time. I thought I had been successful in my attempt to avoid the flowers. Then, the manager asked if it was my birthday, pointing at the flowers. I could no longer ignore the flowers or my beaming friend. He was smiling so wide; that I wanted to go home. I politely told the manager no and decided to talk with my friend.
The Talk
I asked about the flowers. I could have been tactful, but it annoyed me. My friend said, “This is what you do on a date.” I was in disbelief. I asked why did he think this was a date. Then he confessed his feelings for me. I was so disappointed, and he could tell. I told him I did not have a romantic interest in him. I looked at him like a little brother. I considered it for two seconds, but I could not imagine him kissing me. So, that was that. We left and said we would still be friends, but I haven’t heard from him.
Friends
I couldn’t figure out why I was disappointed that my friend wanted to date me. After a lot of thought and prayer, I figured it out. It hurt to know he was never my friend, laying in wait until he thought I was available. When he produced the flowers, I knew I would lose a friend. I still believe men and women can be friends. Maybe we will be friends again. In the meantime, I’ll value the friendships I have even more.
Thanks for joining me on this journey,
Kim