Category: Obedience

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Discipline and Legacy

woman holding neck staring on wall
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As of late, I live at the intersection of legacy and discipline. The older I get, the more I think about getting my affairs in order and the legacy I want to leave behind. Of course, I want to leave money and houses, but I also want to leave something more precious. I want to leave a legacy that will impact this generation and those to come; one of righteous living. 

Those who came before me left indelible marks and undeniable impressions. For me, the natural question is what will my future grandkids say about me? Who will they say I am? Will they know me as kind and compassionate? Or will they only know me from the money and houses I left to them? While I plan to do both, I prefer more of the former. I want to be known for leaving people in a place better than I found them. This leaves me to wonder, is my life a reflection of that now?

My Legacy

Should I leave this earth right now, could I honestly say that I lived so righteously that I influenced other people to come to Christ? Can I say that I followed Christ to the best of my ability in every instance? When I have children will they look at me like I look at my father– someone whose life has constantly displayed and proven the goodness of Yahweh?

In every trial, illness, and upset, I remember my father sitting us all down and speaking about the goodness of the Lord. I remember him leading us in prayer as a family. I remember him insisting I pay tithes and telling me the reasons why. This is how I want to be remembered. This is the legacy I want to leave—a testament to the goodness of our Father.

Discipline

So, as I look at my life right now I cannot honestly say that’s the total legacy I want to leave. Perhaps I have impacted some and given hope to others. But I now need discipline and intentionality to really live full out for God. Fortunately, God hasn’t called me home yet and there is still time to get it right. I can still leave the legacy I want to. I must remember that God has given me the self-discipline to do it. He has and will provide me with spiritual wisdom to achieve a life that proves His goodness. Through His Son, Yeshua, I know that nothing is impossible for me if I just believe and declare it. 

From this day forward, I declare by the power Yahweh gave me through Yeshua that these mountains must move. I have the power, love, and discipline to leave an inheritance, a legacy that will benefit this generation and those to come. I will live a life that influences people to seek Christ for themselves. All I have to do is pray, listen, and then obey. 

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love, and self-discipline.

2 Timothy 1:7 (NIV)

He answered, “Because of your little faith (your lack of trust and confidence in the power of God); for I assure you and most solemnly say to you if you have (living) faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and (if it’s God’s will) it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.”

Matthew 17:20 AMP
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The Power Within

So we all know the story about the prodigal son. The scripture where the son demands his inheritance and goes off and squanders it then returns home. The moral of the story is that no matter how far you wander away from home, God will always be there to welcome you back with open arms. Usually, when you hear that parable, it focuses on the prodigal son. Other times the focus is the elder son who stayed. His reaction of anger and resentment is treated as a precautionary tale of what not to do. I don’t often hear the perspective that while the elder son was resentful and angry, the father still offered him grace and comfort. The father tells the elder child, “…Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours.” That’s the power within.

Blessings

The loyal, faithful, and obedient son always had access to the inheritance. Even while rejoicing over the prodigal son’s return, the father ran out to comfort and advised the elder son. The elder son had proximity, access, and his father’s ear. How often do we focus on someone else’s blessing when we had access to our Father the entire time? The loyal and obedient children are always in the presence of the Father. Why should those so near to God take it for granted by looking at another’s blessing?

Full Access

God has placed within us a power that we have access to all of the time. While comforting the elder son, the father says, “all that is mine is yours.” How often do we take our unlimited access to God and His kingdom for granted? All that is His is Ours. Lately, I’ve been feeling like the eldest child. I’m watching everybody else get to celebrate and bask in their blessings. While I don’t begrudge anyone their just deserts, I feel a little left out. 

Which is what I imagine the elder son felt as well. Here I am in the field, working and being obedient. I watch from afar as others get celebrated and blessed, wondering when it will be my turn—forgetting that my Father is right there. I can go and talk to Him at any point in time. 

The Power Within

All I had to do was ask, and it would be given to me because He is close to me. As a matter of fact, even when I was disobedient and willfully rebellious, He still celebrated me and called me back to Him.  And I still had access to His entire kingdom to His full divinity when I returned. It seems a bit silly now. I have God, the Creator, near me, willing to comfort me, and I’m too concerned about when my blessing will come. He is always with me, including his peace, power, and might. 

Rejoice

God’s power resides within me through his Holy Spirit. What shall I fear? Of whom do I have to be afraid? He is near; He inclines His ear to me. He is concerned about me. And it is through that invested power within; He can do exceedingly abundantly above anything I can ask or think. It’s all because of the power within. So, we have God and His power near and in us with any obstacle, challenge, or situation we face. Remember, no matter where we are, we have full access once we come to Him. We are His, and He is ours. Let’s use that power within to edify, support, and love. Our time is coming, and it’ll be sooner than we think.

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Broken Heart

Broken Hearted

I know the pain of a broken heart: the despair, the brokenness, and feelings of helplessness and loneliness. I’ve cried those same tears. I’ve felt there was no one to turn to, no one who could understand what I felt. Yet, there is hope! You will heal from a broken heart.

Broken Heart

Healing from a broken heart requires you first to process the pain. Processing the pain looks different for everyone. Some people cry others shout, and some go to therapy. In my case, it was all three combined. Whatever you do, please don’t hold it in. Someone or something broke your heart, and it hurts. Don’t suffer in silence. Don’t allow your feelings to control you. Let the pain out. Psalm 34:17 says, “The Lord hears His people when they call to Him for help. He rescues them from all their troubles.” The Lord hears you when you cry out, so cry out. No one can listen to what you keep hidden inside. Once you cry out to Him, he will hear you and rescue you from your troubles.

Let It Go

Once you’ve processed the pain and cried out, stop replaying the hurt over and over in your mind. Stop thinking about all the ways you could have avoided it or things you should have done. It won’t ease the hurt. It only makes things worse because you keep reliving the pain. I know it’s going to be hard, but try not to think about it. You have to let it go. Let it go by keeping your mind fixed on God.

Isaiah 26:3 says, “God will keep you in perfect peace when you fix your thoughts on Him.” You can keep your thoughts fixed on Him by thinking about what is true, honorable, right, pure, excellent, and worthy of praise (Philippians 4:8). If you find yourself thinking about the hurt, stop and redirect your thoughts to God and more pleasurable things. In time you will find that you are in His perfect peace and on your way to having a healed heart.

Forgive

In that peaceful place, you’ll find it easier to forgive. Why should you forgive someone who hurt you so deeply? Why should you forgive someone who knew you, loved you, and still hurt you? Should you forgive someone who doesn’t even deserve forgiveness? It doesn’t seem fair. I struggled with this the most. It feels like someone should pay for the pain they inflicted. Someone should hurt, just like you are hurting. The thing is, though, it’s never quite satisfying to hurt someone else just because you’re hurt. It doesn’t erase your pain. You may feel vindicated, but what does that feeling do? It just adds more hurt to the world.

Compassion

In order to forgive, you have to do so from a place of compassion and mercy. You cannot forgive in your own strength. You have to rely on God to give you the grace to forgive. Why does God continually forgive us when we constantly hurt Him? When we intentionally disobey Him? He forgives us because He is full of grace and mercy and expects us to extend that same grace and mercy to others. Colossians 3:13 says, “make allowance for each other’s faults and forgive anyone who offends you.

Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.” We are commanded to forgive as we’ve been forgiven. To forgive, I had to remember that God forgave me when I didn’t deserve it, and He did the same for me. Consider how God has forgiven you. Think about all that you have done and how much mercy God has shown you. Ask the Holy Spirit into your heart so that you can rely on Him for the understanding and compassion needed to forgive someone. Forgiveness will lead to healing. Healing and wholeness are God’s desires for you. Psalm 147:3 says, “He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds.”

Hope

Healing is a process, and there is no timeframe for it. It may take some people a week and take others years. Although dealing with and healing from pain isn’t easy, you will survive. I did, as have so many others. You are still living and breathing and making it through. You may have been knocked down, but it did not destroy you. There is a joy that is coming that you cannot believe. Not only will you survive, but you will also be happy, whole, and wholly healed. You will love again, and it will be all that God has promised. He hasn’t failed you yet, and He never will.

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Living Free Joyfully

living free joyfully
Living

Living noun /ˈliviNG/: the pursuit of a lifestyle of the specified type.

dictionary.com

This is my year of intention. I plan to get every promise God has for me. I’m tired of just existing or surviving. It’s time to live! No longer will I live below the promises of God. Everything that He promised me would be mine. My life will be a reflection of Him. It’s time to come alive and do what God placed in me.

Free

Free adjective /frē/: not under the control or in the power of another; able to act or be done as one wishes.

dictionary.com

As defined by the dictionary, freedom leads one to believe that she can do whatever she wants. The freedom I crave is to be unbound, unrestrained, and no longer obligated under the yoke of the law. My freedom is found in Christ alone. He set me free to live an abundant life. I am free indeed and will obtain this freedom in every area of my life.

Joyfully

Joyfully adverb /ˈjoifəlē/: with great pleasure and happiness.

dictionary.com

His joy is in me, and it is full. I ask this question to myself every day, “What have I done to spark joy today?” Joy is imperative. It’s a reminder that Christ is with me. It helps ease the troubles and woes that being in this world brings. Joy breeds gratitude. I choose joy and to be glad.

Living Free Joyfully

This is a departure from Single In Christ. While that spirit remains, this blog will now focus on the whole single person and not just how to cope with being single. God has so much more in store. I will be married one day. But in the meantime, I’m still a complete person, and I choose to focus on my entire being and not one aspect of it. So, yes, I will still discuss love and dating. However, I will also discuss faith, finances, fitness (mental and physical), and plain old fun. Let’s discover how to obtain freedom and joy in every area!

Continue living free joyfully!

-Kim

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My Updated Plan

Mu Updated Plan

Last year my plan was not to be single by Valentine’s Day 2021. Enter a global pandemic, my parents and sister suffering from COVID-19, losing a job, getting another job, weight gain and loss, and just the trial of life in general. With all of that happening, no one would blame me for taking time off from dating. After all, there are so many reasons not to date.  

However, I still viewed this as a time to go after what I wanted, although I had to be more creative in doing it. So, here’s the big question: did I meet my goal?

Goal Met?

Not exactly, but I’m close. Allow me to explain. My goal was not to be single. So, yes, I’m single, but I did have Valentine’s Day date. See, not exactly the goal, but it’s definitely progress! I’m still committed to working out this plan. This plan covers many areas of my life, and while it’s not just relationship-specific, it has allowed me to accomplish goals in my life.  

I view it like this; I’m doing my best and allowing God to do the rest. I’m fully aware that there are things outside of my control. There certainly are areas where I can improve. I do not have it all together. But with God’s help and wisdom, I know I will accomplish fantastic things. I know His plan will manifest in the earth. So, no, my timeline didn’t exactly work out, but my goal is still in full effect.

New Plan

So, what’s my new updated plan? To continue rotationally dating multiple men and enjoying myself. My goal isn’t just marriage now. My goal is also to adopt a new mindset and enjoy the journey instead of anticipating the destination. This time, I’m going to pray and allow God to lead me. While I did pray last year, it was more of an afterthought than allowing His Holy Spirit to lead. My plan now includes being excited about the possibilities and not afraid of the outcome.

I’m letting go of the rigidity and timeline of my plan and allow God to intervene as He sees fit. Basically, I’m submitting to His will. I haven’t totally abandoned my plan. I adjusted it to be in line with God’s will. I highly suggest allowing God to have His way. It will blow your mind every time. So, in all things, be led by the Holy Spirit and enjoy the journey. We are complete humans with so many experiences—no need to wait on the next stage to start enjoying it. 

Thanks for joining me on this journey through singleness,

Kim

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My Updated Plan